1989.Creation of the Swedish Bikini Team: under the auspices of Stroh’s brewing Company for Olde Milwaukee Beer. They hired five actresses to portray the Swedish Bikini Team. Peggy Trentini was designated the captain. Heather Parkhurst, Ana Keller, Jane Frances and Avalon Anders rounded out the original members. None were actually Swedish; they wore matching wigs and faked the accents.
The Original SBT Gals
The spoof TV commercial campaign was a smashing success. Olde Milwaukee beer sales increased. However, several female employees of Stroh’s filed a lawsuit against Stroh’s for sexual harassment because they used girls in bikinis in the commercials to sell their beer. A very clever, opportunistic lawyer, Laurie Peterson, convinced Stroh brewery’’ CEO, John Stroh, to cave in to the ‘feminists’ demands. John agreed to settle out of court for several million dollars. BTW; Laurie was a babe, she could have been an SBT member. John, an insecure oddball, folded under public scrutiny.
1992. January. The SBT girls did a layout for Playboy, which included the cover. Peggy and Heather had no problem doing nude photos. Jane and Avalon had no problem with topless. Anna was shy. Playboy respected each girl’s position.
1993. Peggy had been dating Sylvester Stallone for a few years. This ended when Sly had a confrontation with a member of the paparazzi who took some pictures of Peggy with Sly in his new Mercedes 500 SL. Sly freaked out because he didn’t want his wife to know that he had a girlfriend. It made national headlines and the Sly and Peggy affair was soon history.
The talk show controversy began. Avalon Anders went on the Maury Pauvitch show and claimed that she was forced to do her Playboy layout topless against her wishes. She elaborated for several minutes about how Playboy and the other girls coerced her. Then, at just the right moment, Maury produced a copy of a letter Avalon had written to Playboy praising them for their professionalism and expressing the desire to workwith them in the future. Avalon was exposed as a fraud on national TV. She was kicked off the team.
1994. The remaining girls did a series of live appearances and ultimately disbanded.
1995. Ron Bryan held an open casting call for a new TV show. One of the applicants was Anna Keller, former member of the Swedish Bikini Team. Ron, a big fan, asked her what had happened to the team. She related the above information to him. Ron began writing a novel and a screenplay based on the plight of the Swedish Bikini Team. He then resurrected the team, signed them to a management contract and began development on ‘The Revenge of the Swedish Bikini Team’. This was shelved as a film, as caper number one, to be shot as a prequel. It is also a novel, Revenge is a Dish Best Served Warm, to be released in late 2007.
1996. The SBT girls went on Inside Edition, under Ron’s guidance, to announce the resurrection of the Swedish Bikini Team and Avalon was welcomed back live, on national TV. This was the next-to-last recorded appearance of all five of the original SBT members.
1997. The occasion was the making of the 1998 Swedish Bikini Team calendar, which was taped by Entertainment Tonight. This was the last public appearance of the original SBT babes. Heather Parkhurst chose not to show up so reserve SBT member Ginger took her place. Five minutes into the interview, the girls dropped their accents and lost their team spirit, against Ron’s strict orders to remain in character. Ron soon realized that he would have to send the original faux ‘Swedish’ bimbos into exile along with their fake accents and stupid wigs.
1998. Nefarious ‘feminists’ break into the postproduction studio and confiscate all of the SBT videotapes.
1999. The re-invention of the Swedish Bikini Team with real Swedish babes and the filing of Swedish Bikini Team and SBT trademarks.At this critical point, Ron Bryan out-maneuvered the Stroh Brewing Company by filing for trademarks in all available categories.
Ron decided that the Swedish Bikini Team had to be authentic. The search was on for Swedish girls who were beautiful, intelligent and athletic. The rallying cry became “Beauty, Brains Bravery”…which became the SBT motto.
Exhibiting infinite wisdom Ron decides that the SBT must have family appeal. The girls sign contracts that they will not appear nude or topless as SBT members. And the Bimbo Factor is forever banned.
2000. Ron raised the funds for caper number two of the Swedish Bikini Team franchise: the working title is Never Say Never Mind.
2001. Never Say Never Mind was shot in London. It was shot in four weeks with no rehearsals. The girls, by then real Martial Artists, did their own stunts and their own fighting. Their Sensei, Master Santos Flaniken, the film’s fight coordinator, was on-set during the filming and kept the girls tuned in. And Stroh’s was purchased by Pabst.
2002. Development of SBT caper number three, Moonbreaker commences.
The girls began to receive training in combat handgun techniques, which they will need for their next film. Their instructor, Nelson Dymond, was impressed at how quickly they became proficient. After a few weeks of training, they entered a combat scenario contest at Lake Piru against a bunch of men. The girls beat some of the men and earned a huge amount of respect from men and women alike. They received invitations from all across the USA and all around the world inviting us to compete in other firearms contests. We got 5 million hits on our website, www.swedishbikiniteam.com, in less than a week.
2003. Ron toned down the publicity in order to time the next surge with the preproduction of Moonbreaker. He began to focus on building the brand and designing merchandise.Through dogged determination, the Lost Tapes are located. A ‘feminist’ decides to become a normal woman. She tells her new boyfriend who tips Ron on their whereabouts. Ron stages a bold nighttime raid at their headquarters in West Los Angeles and gets the tapes back. The ‘feminists’ scatter like cockroaches.
2004/2005. Ron decides that Never Say Never Mind is to be shelved until a clever Internet marketing campaign can be staged. He goes into litigation and takes over the film from the distributor.
2006/2007. A new website is designed for the Swedish Bikini Team. The web address is still swedishbikiniteam.com. Ron develops a clever Internet marketing scheme, raises the funds to shoot the opening and to do the final edit. The title of the film becomes Never Mind. The DVD cover is designed by Jennifer Richardson. In November the digital edited master is delivered to US Digital Media Group for DVD authoring and replication.
Currently, the SBT girls are working out in the gym like madwomen, honing their SCUBA skills (two are already certified), working on their golfing skills and expanding their firearms skills. They will soon be introduced to western-style horseback riding. Their instructors are a former rodeo bull rider and a rodeo barrel racer.
Ron is compiling and editing the documentary The Lost Tapes of the SBT. He perseveres even though he feels personal embarrassment at the stupidity of the original members. He feels that it is more historically important to expose the travesty of deliberate bimbo-ness than to hide it. He realizes that just like ugly; bimbosity goes all the way to the bone. He is very happy that he re-invented the SBT. No wonder that the ‘feminists’ hated the Swedish Bikini Team; especially with those stupid wigs.
The Lost Tapes of the SBT will be available soon on DVD.
Never Mind will be released as a DVD on the Internet November 2007.